Got in a discussion recently with someone about love. The person I discussed things with implied that the people in your life shouldn’t put up with your “issues” and that there’s no such thing as true, unconditional love.
We all have issues, can we agree on that? People are in a constant state of flux. We are a work in progress from the day we’re born until the day we die.
But love doesn’t expect change. It might strive for it, support it, challenge it, but it doesn’t demand it. When you choose to love someone (and I firmly believe love is a choice), you choose to take them as they are with no promises or guarantees of fixing them, healing them, or changing them, in the future.
Love just is.
If you can’t let it be, well, that’s not unconditional love. And there’s no such thing as conditional love.
We all go through periods of doubt, don’t we? We wonder if we’re good enough. If we’re truly loved and understood by those around us. If we’re even lovable. If there will come a day when the people we love most will stop putting up with our “issues” or flaws or weaknesses. And what would we do when that time came? Would we be strong enough to handle it or would we curl up and die? It’s a frightening thought.
I had one of those moments of doubt recently and asked my husband (who I’ve known for 10 years), “You know me, right? All of me. You know I have issues?”
He looked at me and said, in his casual, easy-breezy way, “Of course I do. I accommodate them because I love you.”
I smiled and all doubt was washed away. Because there is such a thing as true, unconditional love. And I have it.
So…what does love mean to you?
(This is such a hot topic and I have more to say so I’m going to continue it later this week)